January-February 2016

A roundup of notable quotables

“Fingerprints. DNA. Blood tests. Surveillance cameras. Whatever. I’ve seen more cases turn on what people posted about THEMSELVES on Facebook than all these other kinds of evidence combined.”

Jon English, Assistant Criminal District Attorney in Galveston County, posting on Facebook

“I wasn’t driving that car. My dog was driving that car.”

Reliford Cooper III, age 26, to sheriff’s deputies in Manatee County, Florida, after he led officers on a short chase that ended when Cooper crashed into a house. Cooper, who smelled like “booze and burnt pot,” fled on foot, ended up at a church, and was forced back outside by churchgoers, where he was arrested. He denied driving the crashed car, blaming his dog instead. No dog was found at the scene. (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/reliford-cooper-dog-driving-car_561bbe80e4b0e66ad4c87505)

“Both subjects advised they had been Dumpster-diving, and judging by all of the trash in their vehicle, I believed them.”

From a Granbury Police Department police report (submitted by Hood County Attorney Lori Kaspar).

“I agree. [pause] That’s the first time, isn’t it?”

San Antonio lawyer Michael McCrum, special prosecutor in the abuse-of-power case against former Governor Rick Perry, responding to a statement by Anthony Buzbee, Perry’s lead attorney. Buzbee had told reporters that Perry would not be present for arguments before the Court of Criminal Appeals November 18, as “it would be very unusual” for a defendant to attend. (http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/Rick-Perry-enjoying-road-trips-around-the-6593797.php)

“My sense was that we had to make changes or a federal court is going to strike down the whole program, and we need this program—some of these people would scare the hell out of you.”

State Senator John Whitmire, as quoted in The New York Times newspaper, about Texas’ recent overhaul of the civil commitment program for sexually violent predators. (http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/30/us/states-struggle-with-what-to-do-with-sex-offenders-after-prison.html?emc=edit_th_20151030&nl=todaysheadlines&nlid=34360753)

“If you’re accused of a crime & you respond with a question about the statute of limitations, you probably did it.”

Patrick Wilson, County and District Attorney in Ellis County (@EllisCountyDA), on Twitter.