November-December 2015

Notable quotables

“You’re lucky: You’re going to die soon.”

Kevin Daigle, a Louisiana man whose truck was stuck in a ditch, to Senior Trooper Steven Vincent after he shot Vincent in the head. Trooper Vincent had stopped to help the man after determining that Daigle’s truck had been reported as a “reckless vehicle,” and as he talked with him at the roadside, Daigle opened the driver’s side door, pulled out a sawed-off shotgun, and shot the officer in the head. Vincent died the next day at the hospital. The whole incident was recorded by Vincent’s cruiser camera. (http://www.khou.com/story/news/nation/2015/08/24/police-gunman-shot-taunted-louisiana-trooper/32254917/)

“I should have done this a lot sooner. I don’t have to take it. You’re out.”

Judge Jack Skeen in Smith County, to James Calvert, a capital murder defendant accused of shooting his estranged wife, Jelena Sriraman, and abducting their 4-year-old son before fleeing to Louisiana. Calvert had been acting as his own legal defense throughout pre-trial proceedings and his criminal trial, drawing increasingly strong admonishments from the judge, until—midway through the presentation of the State’s case—Calvert refused to stand when talking to the judge, at which point Judge Skeen terminated his self-representation. Calvert was found guilty of capital murder and sentenced to death. (http://www.kltv.com/story/30036181/judge-administers-calverts-shock-belt-terminates-self-representation)

“I’m out a sport coat, unfortunately.”

Leelanau County (Michigan) Prosecutor Joe Hubbell, after an intoxicated man wearing only boxer shorts and a ball cap was spotted by a janitor wandering around the courthouse after hours. The unnamed man walked into Hubbell’s office, put on a suit jacket from inside the office, and left the building. (http://www.record-eagle.com/news/local_news/update-pantless-man-enters-courthouse-steals-prosecutor-s-suit-jacket/article_e55af6bd-a923-5342-8219-bc0d65241b60.html)

“Dear law students: My opposing counsel destroyed the credibility of his own witness before I got to ask a single question. You’ll be fine.”

Twitter user @lawyerthoughts whose profile says, “Undefeated trial lawyer. Yoga instructor. Legal consultant to the stars. Retired underwear and sleep model. I occasionally lie in my bio.” His profile photo includes the quote, “You don’t have to be a lawyer to interrupt a stranger’s conversation with ‘allegedly.’”

 “I understand they’re just fish, but there’s no reason to do that. That just tells me you’re mean, [and] we have a place for people that are mean that are willing to hurt people to get what they want.”

Judge John McClendon in Lubbock County, to defendant Paul Rodriguez while sentencing him to 50 years in prison for the brutal beating of a Dairy Queen employee during a robbery. Judge McClendon’s remarks referred to punishment-phase testimony from Jay Kemper, whose home was burglarized by the defendant. Kemper said that Rodriguez ransacked every room, scattered their possessions everywhere, and even dumped an entire bottle of fish food into the fish tank in his son’s bedroom. Evidently that detail made an impression on the judge. (http://lubbockonline.com/filed-online/2015-10-14/rodriguez-sentenced-50-years-violent-robbery-south-lubbock-dairy-queen#.Vh_FtaQupXY)